Saturday, 1 August 2009

I know what it looks like!

It never ceases to annoy me when people think that photos of their genitals should affect me so strongly that I would want to meet them. I mean, if I was linking up with someone online with a view to meeting that person face to face at some future point, I am expecting to meet a real breathing human being, a person who can hold a conversation and share a joke. I am not looking to meet his penis! It really sucks that on most gay dating sites, what one finds are photo after photo of male genitals. Its almost as if we need to be constantly reminded of what a penis looks like!

I think it comes down to the fact that many gay men feel debased by their homosexuality and subconsciously believe that high moral standards are not expected of them. It is one of the reasons why we find that the majority of gay men have no misgivings about being promiscuous. Gay men seem to think that because they're gay, they are of necessity less moral than others. And this appears to be more profound among Africans and those of African descent, many of who still believe that their homosexuality is wrong. Some even have feelings of shame and in the process suffer low self-esteem. I think this is unfortunate, because proud honourable gay men who wish to portray an image of respectability find that this is more difficult to do than it should be.

6 comments:

Naughty feeling said...

Hey.
Am so glad to hear that am not the only person opposed to that kind of profile advertisement. Though many people dont give it much consideration, i find it repulsive in that it does not let me get to know the person themselves. Take care.

Beauty said...

"Gay men seem to think that because they're gay, they are of necessity less moral than others." There will always be good and bad everywhere but educating those that seem to flaunt society rules is still the challenge everywhere. It is not on not to be part of the collective. Flamboyant behaviour of gay and transgender monks raise eyebrows.

Free Surf said...

Forgive me. But I couldn't help but laugh @ your annonyance. What did you expect from these gay dating sites or whateva they are called? After the first two exchange of messages, the netx thing is,"Do you live alone? and I've got an 11 inch cock that you would love to have up your a**."
Please note I'm not saying you can't find someone decent from these sites but on the majority, they are all looking for sex. Pele. No vex ehn!
Good luck with the search for M's replacement.

Anengiyefa said...

Freesurf, you be bad boy o! lol. So you sef don go dating site enh?

Anonymous said...

You are so on point here Anengiyefa. And sadly, the dearth of long-term gay relationships is more in the African and African-American communities. Most black men in long-term healthy relationships are in inter-racial ones. Its just a sad, sad situation.

The bleak prospects can make a man run back into the closet and begin to seek for 'normalcy' reluctantly in a heterosexual arrangement.

..don't mind my rantings. Cheers.


Donald

Anengiyefa said...

A very sorry state of affairs indeed. However, running back into the closet may provide "normalcy" for others, but would it provide peace of mind for you?

Granted that as a gay African man, the prospects of a happy, fulfilled life in a monogamous relationship with another African man who you really love are not very bright, my view is that one ought to follow one's heart, since in reality, there are no guarantees of a happy outcome whichever direction one chooses to travel down. We should take our chances I think..